My New Superhero Persona

I had to have a second Mammogram yesterday which was a little nerve racking.  I haven't had to retest since college calculus and I finally just took my 'C' and Elvis left the Math building.  Anyway, I was a little nervous so John drove me to the lab and I brought along my new 10" Wonder Woman collectible action figure that I got for Christmas.  (She's awesome but you already know that.)

John, "I dare you to take that into the office and quietly talk to it."
Me, "Tempting."
It would have been funny but there could have been actual sick people in there so probably insensitive as well.

After about 20 minutes in the waiting room,

John, "Mammo…..Mammo……That sounds so funny."
Me, "uh huh"
John, "Mammo, mammo, mammo, mammo"
Me, "I'm remembering the last time you came to the doctor's with me….."
John, "Hey, that was hilarious!"
Me, "uh huh"

I finally got called into the back after another 10 minutes.  I order the #7, Squished Boob 3 Ways.  It's quite good; I highly recommend it.  Then I waited another 10 minutes for Central Casting to send up someone to play the "Absent Minded Professor".  Boy, did they find a good one.  His hair was standing up and everything.

Dr,  "I'm Dr. Something-or-Other."
Me, "Jennifer Moore"
Dr,  "You're super dense."
Me, "You just met me."
Dr,  "Huh?
Me, "Hmm?"
Dr, "Every things fine….words words...extremely dense...words words words... really quite dense...words words words words….not a complete whiteout on the X-ray but close….words words….on the high end of density….words words…..very dense….words words words…..spectrum of tissue density…words words words…high density…..words...
 {Am I being punked?'}
…...words words....very very dense….words words words...density...words words…extremely hard to see through…..words words….
{Really, where's the camera?}
words words….dense…words…dense….words…dense...words words words words...dense dense dense dense dense dense.  Let me find you a brochure."

He fumbles around in his desk for a few minutes then handles me a brochure titled "Breast Density".  Hmm, wonder what this is about?

Me, <thumbing the brochure>"So my breast tissue would be considered…?"
Dr. "Dense."
Me, "Gotcha"

Back out in the waiting room,

John, "So?"
Me, "I'm super dense."
John, "No kidding.  What'd the doctor say?"

When we got back to the car I picked up Wonder Woman and explained to her that I would be her new sidekick,  Captain Density.  I'd swoop in and fall on the villains, trapping them under my inescapable density, until the cops arrive.  I'm envisioning a purple cape and matching go-go boots. A huge Rho emblazoned on my chest.  That's the symbol for density.  I looked it up.