My Old Lady Group

So I attended my monthly Women's Club meeting last week.  When I got there, I had a bit of a panic because I my friend, Lisa, who got me involved in the first place, wasn't there and these old ladies are crazy....

So I sent a few texts to keep her up to date:

Later John asked how the meeting went so I showed him the text string. Including an additional one that I'd sent prior to the monthly board meeting that I also attend because they tricked me.  Crazy yet wily old ladies. 

John, "Uh...wha....hhh....I don't know what any of this means."
Me, "Exactly. Yet notice that Lisa knew exactly what I was talking about each time."
Me, "Want me to explain them to you."
John, "I really don't."

Later, when we were leaving the high school football game:
Sam, "How was your old lady's meeting?"
Me, "It was fine.  I sat at the 'young' table but our token old lady got upset because I kept saying 'fuck'."
John, "JENNIFER!"
Me, "Well, if you had taken a greater interest in my day, I wouldn't be standing here telling the kid.  And he said 'bitch' not 10 minutes ago. You didn't say anything about that."
Sam, "I was being funny and I didn't say the whole word."
Me, "You stopped at H."
John, <walking away> "oh my god."
Me, "What?"