Maybe she's born with it...Maybe not

So last summer I was at the Clinique counter buying some miracle lotion that will erase all of my wrinkles and make me look 30 again, and perusing the lipsticks.  (Lipstick and mascara are the only make-up-y things I wear.)  The clerk selected a summer-y pink-y one and had me try it on.  It was quite nice but I was concerned that the color was too young for me.  When I voiced my concerns, the clerk (who works on commission) assured me that no, no, no it was definitely not to young for me and in fact it brightened up my whole face.  Well, then.  Sold.

When I got home later, I asked John if he noticed anything new? (He LOVES this game) He groaned and since I was still on my new-lipstick-high, I threw him a bone and said, "I got a new lipstick! Whadda think?"
John, "It's nice."
Me, "Do you notice anything else?"
John, <Aw, shit> "Uh, your eyes are sparkly?"
Me, "No, but good answer. The lipstick brightens up my whole face!"
John, "Oh, I was definitely going to say that next."

Then I hollered at the boys to come over and asked them the same question and fed them the same response.  "It brightens up my whole face!"  And this became the joke of the summer.  Every time I wore  my new lipstick, I'd ask them if they noticed.

Me, "Do ya notice anything different???"
Random male, "Uhhhh"

Me, "Do ya notice anything different???"
Random male, "You look lighter?"

Me, "Do ya notice anything different???"
Random male, "Oh. Oh. I know this one!"

Fast forward and yesterday I found myself once again at the Clinique counter.  Unfortunately this time I did not have my credit card with me.  I'd gone out the night before with my friend Suzanne and had taken my i.d. and credit card out of my wallet and put them in the cute little clutch that I was carrying and forgot to put them back into my wallet.  Damn.  I told all of this to John and he handled me some bills from his wallet and walked away.  I chuckled to myself because he really thought that those few bills would cover the purchase.  Bless his heart.

I selected my miracle lotions and potions, and a new lipstick, and texted John to meet me at the register.  When he got there, I told him that I'd need his credit card for the purchase.
John, "But I gave you some money."
Me, "Yeah, but it's not enough."
John, "How much does it cost?"
Clerk, <says a number slightly larger then John was expecting>
John, <staring at the clerk>"WHAT?!?"
John, <staring at me> "WHAT DID YOU GET?!?"
Me, "Look, I got a new lipstick."
John, "Unless it comes on a whore who'll do the dishes, it's not worth it."
He didn't actually say that but I know he was thinking it.
Clerk, <holding several items> "You also get a gift with purchase"
John, "Can we have a fistful of each?"
Then he starts picking up random things on the counter, "Can we have this?" "How about this?" "Maybe 5 or 6 of these?"

He was still muttering as we walked away.
Me, "I have nice skin."
John, "It ain't that nice."

As we were walking to the car I started to tell the boys where we were going next,
Me, "So..."
Random boy, "IT BRIGHTENS UP YOUR WHOLE FACE!"